tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-87936333923734396422024-03-21T17:49:42.955-04:00Wondering MindsWondering Mindshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01674669856017394565noreply@blogger.comBlogger163125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8793633392373439642.post-74449221438277871012016-05-09T05:22:00.000-04:002016-05-09T05:23:13.449-04:00Ten Tips for Raising Sexually Healthy Orthodox Daughters<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">WRITTEN BY TALLI ROSENBAUM</span><br />
<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">This article is reposted from The Times of Israel. It was posted there just over two years ago, and is just as relevant every day.</span><br />
<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">http://blogs.timesofisrael.com/10-tips-to-raising-sexually-healthy-orthodox-daughters/</span><br />
<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">___________________________________</span><br />
<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"></span><br />
<span class="apple-converted-space" style="background-color: white; color: #cc0000; font-family: georgia, 'times new roman', serif;">As </span><span style="background-color: white; color: #cc0000; font-family: georgia, 'times new roman', serif;">a
sex therapist treating women and couples in the Orthodox community, I am
confronted daily with the seeming paradox of messages regarding</span><span class="apple-converted-space" style="background-color: white; color: #cc0000; font-family: georgia, 'times new roman', serif;"> </span><em style="background-color: white; color: #cc0000; font-family: georgia, 'times new roman', serif; font-stretch: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: inherit; outline: none;"><span style="border: 1pt none windowtext; padding: 0in;">tzniut</span></em><span style="background-color: white; color: #cc0000; font-family: georgia, 'times new roman', serif;"> (loosely defined as modesty) and healthy
sexuality.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">Young couples that are socialized against premarital
physical intimacy, and receive little or no formal sexual education, are
expected to engage in, and hopefully even enjoy, complete sexual relations
immediately after marriage. They may experience a cognitive dissonance around
sex, leading to difficulties in sexual functioning.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">I highlighted this conflict at a recent lecture to women in my own community,
who gathered to learn more about how to enhance marital intimacy. I spoke about
how sexuality is not just about engaging in physical relations but encompasses
several domains of development which include, among many other factors,
positive body image, confidence, and security. I suggested that while modesty
in dress and behavior are legitimate values, they should not be taught in ways
that shame, blame, objectify, or instill fear regarding male lust.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">A few weeks after the lecture, I received the
following query from one of the participants:<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">One issue that you mentioned when I heard you speak left an
impression on me. You said that despite raising our daughters with a sense of
tzniut and appropriate behavior before marriage, we also want to raise them
with a healthy sense of their sexuality and, later, a healthy understanding of
and attitude toward sex, before they are sexually active. This seems like a big
challenge! If you could share some of your wisdom, I’m sure many would
appreciate it.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
</blockquote>
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<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">Is this really a challenge? Must<span class="apple-converted-space"> </span><em style="font-stretch: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: inherit; outline: none;"><span style="border: 1pt none windowtext; padding: 0in;">tzniut</span></em><span class="apple-converted-space"> </span>messages and values proscribing premarital sex result
in dysfunctional sexuality after marriage?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">This
question comes up often, and most recently was re-visited in a <a href="http://www.jewfem.com/easyblog1/entry/it-s-time-to-tell-the-truth-about-kallah-teachers" target="_blank"><span style="border: 1pt none windowtext; padding: 0in; text-decoration: none;">passionate blog post<span class="apple-converted-space"> </span></span></a>by Dr. Elana Sztokman, who
points out that “Orthodox women are socialized into constant, excessive
pressure to cover and comport our bodies…Our bodies are a thing to be feared
and covered and talked about.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">With all those negative messages, Dr. Sztokman
ponders, how are women supposed to be sexually uninhibited and free once they
are married? “All that obsessive cover is magically transformed into the secret
kallah (bridal preparation) classes, where you learn that you’re going to be
getting naked in front of your new husband and having sex.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">These are important and legitimate questions and it’s
time to consider solutions. The first step is to dispel the expectation that
sexual education begins with the kallah instructor. The road to development of
healthy sexuality begins at home. Sexual development begins at conception and
how we as parents raise our daughters from infancy can shape their sexual sense
of self.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">Here are ten tips to consider from early childhood
through adolescence, and upon marriage:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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Acknowledge what feels good:</span></strong><span class="apple-converted-space"> </span>Validate
your child’s senses. Whether its back tickling, bubble baths, the smell of a
jasmine flower, or the warm sun shining down on a chilly day, point out how
wonderful it is to feel physically pleasant sensations. Teach girls to
experience and not just accomplish things. Do not stop or discourage your
daughter from self-genital stimulation. It’s normal. When appropriate, you can
explain that it’s a “private” activity.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><strong style="font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; line-height: inherit; outline: none;"><span style="border: 1pt none windowtext; padding: 0in;">Touch:</span></strong><span class="apple-converted-space"><b><span style="border: 1pt none windowtext; padding: 0in;"> </span></b></span>Touch is a basic human need and the ability to receive
and feel safe with touch is basic to sexuality. Hugging, cuddling, massages at
the spa for her 16<sup style="font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: inherit; outline: none;"><span style="border: 1pt none windowtext; padding: 0in;">th</span></sup><span class="apple-converted-space"> </span>birthday, help prepare young women for sexual life. I
was recently told that teachers at some<span class="apple-converted-space"> </span><em style="font-stretch: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: inherit; outline: none;"><span style="border: 1pt none windowtext; padding: 0in;">ulpanot</span></em><span class="apple-converted-space"> </span>(religious girl’s high school) discourage hugs between
students. Teaching girls to respect each other’s boundaries is good, but a
completely touch-free environment is not. It is amazing how many young brides
are unable to </span><span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">engage in sexual touch because they are not used to ever being
touched at all.</span><br />
<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div itemprop="articleBody" style="background: white; font-stretch: inherit; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; outline: none; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><strong style="font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; line-height: inherit; outline: none;"><span style="border: 1pt none windowtext; padding: 0in;">Facilitate a positive body
image:</span></strong><span class="apple-converted-space"> </span>Do not
disparage your daughter’s physical qualities, ask her if she really “needs” a
second portion of dessert, or tell her she should lose weight if she wants to
find a husband. Women come in all shapes and sizes, and health, not thinness,
should be encouraged. Be a positive role model and never say, “I am so fat” in
front of your daughters.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div itemprop="articleBody" style="background: white; font-stretch: inherit; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; outline: none; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><strong style="font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; line-height: inherit; outline: none;"><span style="border: 1pt none windowtext; padding: 0in;">Exercise (and wear what you
want in the gym): </span></strong>Girls
need to know their bodies, feel strong and in control, and comfortable within
their own skin. Don’t say, “don’t swing your hips that way, its not modest.”
Say yes to Zumba, belly dancing, yoga, and let girls be comfortable in shorts
and tank tops. All these activities are available in girls- and women-only
settings. Discourage heavy outerwear or “modest pool wear” at women’s only
swim. What for? Save the bathing skirts for family beach outings.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div itemprop="articleBody" style="background: white; font-stretch: inherit; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; outline: none; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><strong style="font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; line-height: inherit; outline: none;"><span style="border: 1pt none windowtext; padding: 0in;">Let her primp: </span></strong>Be patient with your daughter’s need for personal
space and time spent getting dressed and “primping.” Often, this behavior
merely reflects teens’ attempts to maintain some sense of control over their
rapidly changing bodies.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div itemprop="articleBody" style="background: white; font-stretch: inherit; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; outline: none; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><strong style="font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; line-height: inherit; outline: none;"><span style="border: 1pt none windowtext; padding: 0in;">Talk about sex and genitals:</span></strong><span class="apple-converted-space"> </span>When kids ask questions about sex, parents should
provide open and honest answers at a level appropriate to the child’s age. If
adults do not provide accurate information, children are forced to rely on
their peers or other potentially inaccurate sources. And don’t whitewash body
parts. You can say vulva and vagina and explain the difference. How else can
she tell you if something hurts or itches if she doesn’t have the language for
that body part? Acknowledge it, or it won’t exist for her. And don’t tell her
that tampons are only for after marriage. This also sends the message that her
genitals are currently irrelevant.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div itemprop="articleBody" style="background: white; font-stretch: inherit; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; outline: none; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><strong style="font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; line-height: inherit; outline: none;"><span style="border: 1pt none windowtext; padding: 0in;">Use media as an opportunity:</span></strong><span class="apple-converted-space"> </span>When you let kids watch violent scenes in a movie, but
run to turn off the TV if there is a kissing scene, you send a negative
message. Who was kissing and what was the context? This is a great opportunity
to talk about values around sex, normative feelings of desire and arousal, as
well as how to teach about boundaries. If you see an advertisement of a half
naked woman selling a product, rather than “prutza* shame” the model, use the
opportunity to talk about the objectification of women’s bodies in advertising.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div itemprop="articleBody" style="background: white; font-stretch: inherit; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; outline: none; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><strong style="font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; line-height: inherit; outline: none;"><span style="border: 1pt none windowtext; padding: 0in;">Model healthy sexuality:</span></strong><span class="apple-converted-space"> </span>Let your kids see that you and your partner love and
are attracted to one another and don’t be afraid to kiss and hug when they are
around. Even if they act averse, don’t believe it; deep down, kids love to see
that their parents are affectionate. Lest you think this can only work in
modern Orthodox households, even Haredi couples, who traditionally don’t show
physical affection in front of kids, can send positive messages with
affectionate words and behavior.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div itemprop="articleBody" style="background: white; font-stretch: inherit; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; outline: none; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><strong style="font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; line-height: inherit; outline: none;"><span style="border: 1pt none windowtext; padding: 0in;">Encourage your daughters to
“tell me what you want, what you really, really want”:</span></strong><span class="apple-converted-space"><b><span style="border: 1pt none windowtext; padding: 0in;"> </span></b></span>To enjoy sex, one need to be able to say things like
“this feels good” or “this is uncomfortable”. If girls do not learn the
language of asking for, or anticipating that their needs be met, they will have
a hard time experiencing pleasure.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
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Don’t frame Nidda laws as “protective”</span></strong><span style="font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: inherit; outline: none;"><span style="border: 1pt none windowtext; padding: 0in;">: <span class="apple-converted-space"> </span></span></span>Dr. Sztokman states “You go from one extreme to the other
without anything in between. …there is no such thing as affection which is not
sexual — a man is not even supposed to pass the salt to his wife when he can’t
have sex with her because you never know where passing the salt can lead to.”
However, you wish to explain the “harchakot”**, let’s not attribute them to the
need to make boundaries. That makes the perceived force of touch as turning
immediately to sexual intercourse into something scary and uncontrollable, and
can create anxiety in many young women, particularly as they return home from
the mikvah.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div itemprop="articleBody" style="background: white; font-stretch: inherit; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; outline: none; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><strong style="font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; line-height: inherit; outline: none;"><span style="border: 1pt none windowtext; padding: 0in;">Encourage autonomy:</span></strong><span class="apple-converted-space"> </span>In order to say yes, you have to have the option to
say no.If a woman is told that she must “provide” sex because her husband expects,
wants and needs it, she will understand that h</span><span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">er body does not belong to her,
and this will affect her ability to view sex positively.</span><br />
<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><em style="font-stretch: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: inherit; outline: none;"><span style="border: 1pt none windowtext; padding: 0in;">—</span></em></span></div>
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<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><em style="font-stretch: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: inherit; outline: none;"><span style="border: 1pt none windowtext; padding: 0in;">* loosely, the Jewish
version of slut</span></em><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><em style="font-stretch: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: inherit; outline: none;"><span style="border: 1pt none windowtext; padding: 0in;">**Rabbinic proscriptions
against physical closeness during menstrual bleeding and 7 days thereafter
prior to immersion in the mikvah</span></em><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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Wondering Mindshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01674669856017394565noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8793633392373439642.post-28151413937958854752015-08-21T09:41:00.000-04:002015-08-21T09:41:53.775-04:00Life Falls Apart<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">It all happens at once.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">The dominoes start to fall, and things just build up.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Over and over.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">One thing after another.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Dumpings.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Illnesses.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Deaths.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">It doesn't matter when the train will reach the end of the track, because right now it is barreling along and taking down everything in its path.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Life can be a bitch sometimes.</span>Wondering Mindshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01674669856017394565noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8793633392373439642.post-16360878262700186692015-07-20T09:12:00.000-04:002015-07-20T09:12:46.172-04:00Telling People Off - Being Honest With Oneself<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Yesterday I messaged a friend and told them they weren't being a good friend.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">It's not something that is easy to tell someone, and it's not easy for someone to hear. But sometimes it needs to be said.</span><br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I'm just throwing it out there, that you aren't a good friend. I know that may hurt to hear, but you really aren't ever there when needed.</span></blockquote>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">And their response?</span><br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I think you might be right<br />I know you don't want to hear this but i don't think i can be the kind of friend you need</span></blockquote>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"> Thanks Sherlock, I'm pretty sure I told you that already...</span>Wondering Mindshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01674669856017394565noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8793633392373439642.post-66158221406237120322015-07-20T09:04:00.000-04:002015-07-20T09:12:55.028-04:00Girls Are Wasting My Time<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">If the person you are going out with isn't right for you, then tell them.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Don't "know about it for a while and finally say something".</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Be honest. Be truthful. Be straightforward.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">When you are going out with someone, the longer it goes on, the longer one side has to grow feelings of "like" or "disdain" for the other.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">So you shouldn't drag things out if you've made a decision. It just isn't fair to all involved.</span>Wondering Mindshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01674669856017394565noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8793633392373439642.post-23546017530658098682015-05-09T21:26:00.000-04:002015-05-09T21:26:11.476-04:00Wants Vs. Needs<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Want --- Someone to watch TV with</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Need --- Someone to enjoy TV with</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Want --- Someone to chat with</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Need --- Someone to talk to</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Want --- Someone to care</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Need --- Someone to have compassion</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Want --- To have feelings again, of any sort</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Need --- To care for something</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Want --- A reason to...</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Need --- For it all to be over</span>Wondering Mindshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01674669856017394565noreply@blogger.com0Hell, MI 48169, USA42.43472 -83.98500000000001416.9126855 -125.29359400000001 67.9567545 -42.676406000000014tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8793633392373439642.post-16113359373510899612015-04-13T09:50:00.000-04:002015-04-13T09:50:53.446-04:00Minds Wandering <span style="color: #990000; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">As I make my bi-weekly pilgrimage through reading blog posts, I realize that I haven't posted on here in a while, and I apologize.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I have had writing on other blogs taking up my time, but don't get me wrong...I haven't run out of things to complain about on here.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But after a while I would just start to sound repetitive, and voicing the same things over and over. And while I have issues, I just don't tend to vent myself often, and that is another reason why this blog has been long dormant.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Should I start things back up here? Will the minds come back to their home base? Will the one finally decide to say yes?<br /></span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Those are all really hard questions, with no answers in sight.</span>Wondering Mindshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01674669856017394565noreply@blogger.com576 9th Avenue, New York, NY 10011, USA40.7417806 -74.00450119999999315.219746099999998 -115.31309519999999 66.2638151 -32.695907199999994tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8793633392373439642.post-37708200998992743362014-12-09T09:37:00.000-05:002014-12-09T09:37:18.746-05:00Who Knows Anymore (Last Hope)<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">What if it all ended tomorrow?</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">What would be remembered from it all?<br />What would be missed?</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">What would the hopes have been?</span><br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="background-color: white; color: blue; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; line-height: 16px;">I dont even know myself at all</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: blue; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; line-height: 16px;">I thought I would be happy by now</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: blue; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; line-height: 16px;">But the more I try to push it</span><br />
<span style="color: blue; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-family: proxnov-reg, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 16px;">I realize gotta let go of control</span><span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-family: proxnov-reg, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 16px;"> </span></span></blockquote>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Would anything be different?</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Would a second chance at everything turn out the same?</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Would more people show how they care?</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Would they just keep saying things are normal?</span><br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="color: blue;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">It's just a spark </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="color: blue;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">But it's
enough to keep me going</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;"><span style="color: blue;">And when
it's dark out, no one's around<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="color: blue;"><u1:p></u1:p>
<u1:p></u1:p>
</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;"><span style="color: blue;">It keeps glowing</span></span><o:p></o:p></div>
</blockquote>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">When I wrote and posted a poem 20+ months ago, with a deeper message hidden in the words, via colors and vertical reading, only one person finally understood it (after some prodding).</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">It meant a lot to me that poem, because it was me trying to express some deep stuff inside me, and not being able to actually say the words out loud, because they are just as scary out loud as they are hidden.</span><br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="color: blue;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Every night I try my
best to dream</span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="color: blue;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Tomorrow makes it better</span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="color: blue;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">And I wake up to the
cold reality</span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;"><span style="color: blue;">And not a thing is
changed</span></span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 13.5pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
</blockquote>
<span style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 16px;"><span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I took down the post a few months after it went up, because I felt it shouldn't be up in a public place, especially the more people that actually knew who I was started reading my blog.</span></span><br />
<span style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 16px;"><span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Sure in recent months I've started another blog under my real name, but I would never have the guts to post something like the poem on there...</span></span><br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="color: blue;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">And the salt in my
wounds isnt burning any more than it used to</span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="color: blue;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Its not that I dont feel
the pain</span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;"><span style="color: blue;">Its just Im not afraid
of hurting anymore</span></span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 13.5pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
</blockquote>
<span style="line-height: 16px;"><span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Some days are ups...some days are downs....and some days you just don't feel anything. </span></span><br />
<span style="line-height: 16px;"><span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">And there isn't always a place to let that out. You want to...you need to...but just can't...just don't know how to...just don't know if you want to...but it will all come out at some point, and it probably won't be pretty.</span></span><br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And the blood of these
veins isnt pumping any less than it ever has<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And thats the hope I
have<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The only thing I know is
keeping me alive</span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 13.5pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
</blockquote>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I chose the lyrics to Paramore's <b>Last Hope</b> as the underlying in this post, because it embodies a lot of what I am feeling....and some of what I want to be feeling.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I know it's rare for me to post on here (and in some ways I apologize for that), but sometimes I need to get things out, so thanks for those still here listening.</span><br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="line-height: normal;">
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; color: blue;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">(So if I let go
of control now, I can be strong)<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; color: blue;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And when its dark
out, no ones around<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; color: blue;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It keeps glowing<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; color: blue;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It's just a spark<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; color: blue;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But it's enough
to keep me going<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; color: blue;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">(So if I keep my
eyes closed, with a blind hope)<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; color: blue;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And when its dark
out, no ones around<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; color: blue;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It keeps glowing</span></span><o:p></o:p></div>
</blockquote>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<span style="box-sizing: border-box;"></span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal;">
<o:p></o:p></div>
Wondering Mindshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01674669856017394565noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8793633392373439642.post-13941847185038546972014-10-13T10:33:00.000-04:002014-10-13T10:33:15.097-04:00Loneliness Alone vs. Loneliness W/ Others<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">It is something I have thought about a lot over the last few weeks, and am trying to figure out if their is a difference.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">If someone is alone, and living somewhere where there is no one else around, they are indeed very alone.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">On the flip side, if someone feels alone when they are surrounded by people ("friends"), is that loneliness more lonely, since they can't see the light even as it surrounds their darkness?</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br />I am certain that people have given up on the Minds, but if anyone is still out there, I'd like to hear your thoughts on the matter.</span>Wondering Mindshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01674669856017394565noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8793633392373439642.post-80977489045991033502014-07-01T07:34:00.003-04:002014-07-01T07:34:40.698-04:00Revenge by Racheli WritesEveryone should read <a href="http://rachelliwrites.blogspot.com/2014/06/revenge.html" target="_blank">this powerful piece</a> by Racheli Dreyfuss over at Racheli Writes.<br />
<br />
<a href="http://rachelliwrites.blogspot.com/2014/06/revenge.html">http://rachelliwrites.blogspot.com/2014/06/revenge.html</a>Wondering Mindshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01674669856017394565noreply@blogger.com2Israel31.046051 34.85161199999993227.5781805 29.688037999999931 34.513921499999995 40.015185999999929tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8793633392373439642.post-42442333284780410122014-05-09T14:00:00.000-04:002014-05-09T14:00:00.913-04:00Belated Blogaversary<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Oh yay.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I've reached the two year mark.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Here's to the next 21 splendid years of this blog!</span>Wondering Mindshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01674669856017394565noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8793633392373439642.post-69862492296793230052014-05-09T09:45:00.000-04:002014-05-09T09:45:40.081-04:00Dating Inspiration<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://thechive.files.wordpress.com/2014/05/inspire-quotes-1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://thechive.files.wordpress.com/2014/05/inspire-quotes-1.jpg" height="640" width="516" /></a></div>
<br />Wondering Mindshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01674669856017394565noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8793633392373439642.post-14299159241524472752014-03-30T20:39:00.000-04:002014-03-30T20:39:06.502-04:00248<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">What does the number 248 mean to you?</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">The simple answer, whether you are Jewish or not, is that a human has 248 limbs.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">It is also the amount of positive commandments in the Jewish world.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">But the noticeable comparison for me, is the amount of words in Shema.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">While I am not always on top of davening, one thing I try to make sure I say correctly, is Shema.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">The 248 words there, should always be said carefully, just as carefully as you'd like each of your 248 limbs to be working.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">This is also why you add three words at the beginning when praying alone, to compensate for the three word that a Chazzan would say at the end, with a minyan.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">This is my first random act of Jewishness on this blog...what is happening to me...</span>Wondering Mindshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01674669856017394565noreply@blogger.com0Kesher Israel - The Georgetown Synagogue, 2801 N Street, Washington, DC 20007, USA38.9069942 -77.057203238.7092572 -77.3799267 39.104731199999996 -76.734479700000009tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8793633392373439642.post-7147863906081943762014-03-24T08:31:00.000-04:002014-03-24T08:31:28.871-04:00Let It Goat<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">The title should be enough to get you to watch this!</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="270" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/A_DaizJnnJQ" width="480"></iframe>
Wondering Mindshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01674669856017394565noreply@blogger.com0Disney Animation, Anaheim, CA 92802, USA33.8073504 -117.91755638.285315899999997 -159.2261503 59.329384899999994 -76.6089623tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8793633392373439642.post-54859488819640889362014-03-13T12:16:00.000-04:002014-03-13T12:16:01.312-04:00Jewish Writers<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Amongst the Bloggers, we are all pretty good at talking about things we know about.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">But sometimes people try to be funny, and just come off sounding unintelligent.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><a href="http://www.theyeshivaworld.com/news/headlines-breaking-stories/219871/purim-post-the-story-of-king-obamachashverosh-year-2014.html">http://www.theyeshivaworld.com/news/headlines-breaking-stories/219871/purim-post-the-story-of-king-obamachashverosh-year-2014.html</a></span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Please guys, don't try to write about the internet and the likes, without knowing anything about them.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br />Calling them "e-invites" instead of "evites" just made me stop reading....close the page...and write this many nonsensical rant.</span>Wondering Mindshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01674669856017394565noreply@blogger.com0United States37.09024 -95.71289100000001323.559521500000002 -116.36718800000001 50.6209585 -75.058594000000014tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8793633392373439642.post-22361043682122678672014-03-07T07:28:00.000-05:002014-04-30T09:47:57.678-04:00Jews Are Funny...Sometimes :)<b>UPDATE: Unfortunately the video was pulled, but I don't pull my Posts :) Just update them!</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
This video is going around, and I thought I'd share it.<br />
Of a Jewish teen in London making one of the British guards actually laugh.<br />
<br />
<br />
<div id="fb-root">
</div>
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<div class="fb-post" data-href="https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=10152658031254115" data-width="466">
<div class="fb-xfbml-parse-ignore">
<a href="https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=10152658031254115">Post</a> by <a href="https://www.facebook.com/danielfrohwein">Daniel Frohwein</a>.<br />
<br />
Hilarious!<br />
<br />
<br /></div>
</div>
Wondering Mindshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01674669856017394565noreply@blogger.com0London, UK51.508515 -0.1254871999999522851.192402 -0.77093419999995227 51.824628000000004 0.51995980000004771tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8793633392373439642.post-75308454382791284712014-03-05T13:44:00.000-05:002014-03-05T13:44:00.022-05:00Reaching Out<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I've had my ups and downs in life.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Most of them occurring for me Post-High School and more-so Post-College.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">But sometimes you just need a place to vent, or a place to talk things out. Regardless if the other side has answers for you or not.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I am thankful that some of the bloggers here have listened to me over the years.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">You guys know who you are.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">On that note, to any random readers reading this (who am I kidding, even I know that no one reads the Minds anymore :) ...although I hit 30k this week!), feel free to email me, or most other bloggers, if you have an issue, and just need someone to talk to.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Most of us don't bite...and the ones who do, are usually doing it in a playful way. Hopefully.</span>Wondering Mindshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01674669856017394565noreply@blogger.com0Therapy Drive, Dunwoody, GA 30338, USA33.9305216 -84.30143120000002533.9288746 -84.303952700000025 33.9321686 -84.298909700000024tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8793633392373439642.post-68133111084241822072014-03-04T11:38:00.000-05:002014-03-04T11:38:00.040-05:00Helping and Giving<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">This was a post I started months ago, but never really put into it more than a few thoughts...so today I decided to clean it up a bit, and push it out.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">In life, you give a lot of things, and get little in return...however, there are some things, that I think need to be returned, or at least thought out a little better.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="color: #990000;">Some of these include:</span><br /><br /><b><span style="color: #45818e; font-size: large;">Wedding Presents</span></b></span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">We give presents and/or money to people when they get engaged and/or married, to help them with their new lives.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">What happens if God forbid it doesn't work out?</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Should they have to then give back whatever it is they received? Or maybe next time they get engaged/married, you don't give them anything? But what if the other side took the gift you gave...now it's like you gave them nothing.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">As such, I only give gifts as wedding presents. For starters, they shouldn't be needing that pot set, or whatever other gift you are giving, until after they are married. Unless of course you are giving cash...in which case they will need that before marriage, but all the more-so after they are married.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<b><span style="color: #45818e; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">Baby Gifts</span></b><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Always ask before you give these...the parents get sooooo many items, that they just can't use.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">For example, how many onesies do you think they need for a newborn? It's great that you got them another one, but by the time they get around to it, (s)he will be up to the next size already.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Similarly for toys. When the child is at a young age, the parents choose which toys the kid gets, and its usually the same one over and over...as it is generally the one sitting closest to the child when (s)he starts crying.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">As for electronic toys...as Jews you should think smarter. Shabbos and YT are some of the hardest times to keep a child entertained, and these toys are next to useless.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">So find out what it is the parents need the most, and get that!</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Sometimes even a free gift works, such as you watching the kid for a night, so that parents can get that much needed night out.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<b><span style="color: #45818e; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">Moving Help</span></b><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">This one is a load of baloney.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I've helped many friends move. And maybe gained a slice of pizza or two in return.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Whoop-de-friggin-do.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">But this isn't done for the reward. It's done for the friendship.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">However, I did have one set of friends who I helped move completely into a fourth floor walk-up...and then they decided to move to Israel a few weeks later, making all my work completely useless.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">So people, do us all a favor...move yourselves, and ask for help on that last day, for the big items.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">No one wants to be wrapping your silverware in paper towels and packing your items.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">That's your job.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"></End Rant></span>Wondering Mindshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01674669856017394565noreply@blogger.com0Babies, Oceanside, CA 92057, USA33.2286803 -117.321120733.2285763 -117.3212782 33.2287843 -117.3209632tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8793633392373439642.post-19171178268197412952014-03-03T10:25:00.000-05:002014-03-03T10:25:00.195-05:00Investments<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Dating is an investment.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">The more you put into it, the more you hope that the payout is.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">As such, you need to make every date count for the most, be it a first date, or the eighth.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Recently I made some long-term investments, that unfortunately didn't pan out.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Sure, money and time and effort was put into it.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">But ultimately, who cares about all those things.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">If you worry about everything you put into it, and that you got nothing out of it, you will ultimately fall behind the game, and start making bad investments.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">So if you believe in something, put your all into it, and hope that it pans out!</span>Wondering Mindshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01674669856017394565noreply@blogger.com2Las Vegas, NV, USA36.255123 -115.2383485000000335.8453825 -115.88379550000003 36.664863499999996 -114.59290150000002tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8793633392373439642.post-27803674107412208062014-03-02T13:16:00.001-05:002014-03-02T13:16:45.703-05:00Evolution of Jewish Bloggers<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">While I have been on the blogger scene for a few years, blogging myself on and off, I have discovered a few things about the Jewish Blogger.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">For starters, most of them do not blog in their own names. If/When it is discovered by a friend who they are, they close down the blog, and soon thereafter open a new blog under a different name.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">As such, it's sometimes hard to follow blogs, because it's impossible to keep track of those that are popping up and closing...</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">When I first started, there were about 10 blogs I followed earnestly. A few months later, I re-searched, and found a bunch of new ones to follow, as the first ones slowly closed down. Leaving my lists intact.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">It's a shame really, because it means that over time, as I haven't been as vigilant on searching and finding, my blogger read list has dwindled down to only a few reads a week.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">So if any people know of good Jewish blogs to read and/or follow, please comment them or email them to me.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">It would be greatly appreciated!</span>Wondering Mindshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01674669856017394565noreply@blogger.com2Utah, USA39.3209801 -111.0937311000000133.0518081 -121.4208796 45.5901521 -100.76658260000002tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8793633392373439642.post-29985500290741657032014-02-03T08:33:00.000-05:002014-02-03T08:33:22.763-05:00Disney + Valentines Day = Dirty Walt<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I will now spoil Disney for all you lovers.</span><br />
<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">For all those like-minded dirty-minded folks...enjoy </span><br />
<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">:)</span><br />
<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
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<span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">h/t: #BuzzFeed</span>Wondering Mindshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01674669856017394565noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8793633392373439642.post-7667580585082612682014-01-09T05:51:00.002-05:002014-01-09T05:51:40.308-05:00OTD Bingo<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Thank you FrumSatire for this wonderful piece of joy.(who credited it to Leah Vincent)</span><br />
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<br />Wondering Mindshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01674669856017394565noreply@blogger.com0Bingo, Las Vegas, NV 89135, USA36.1559498 -115.334779936.155549300000004 -115.3354104 36.1563503 -115.3341494tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8793633392373439642.post-5034705520340504302013-12-14T23:24:00.002-05:002013-12-14T23:24:29.707-05:00Great Laws - Ice Missles<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Connecticut has a new law going into effect at the end of the month, that is already in place in many states, and which needs to spread to all locales.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">The law is against "Ice Missiles". </span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Ice Missiles are what happens when you don't clean the snow properly off the top of your car, and then go for a drive, shooting snow and ice off the top of your car, onto other cars around you, or passerby's.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><a href="http://ctboom.com/12-31-13-new-ice-missile-law-goes-effect-connecticut-drivers/">http://ctboom.com/12-31-13-new-ice-missile-law-goes-effect-connecticut-drivers/</a></span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">True story: I know people who have died from ice missiles. As another car stopped, the ice shot off the roof, and through their windshield, killing them.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">So take the extra few minutes and clean all the snow off your car, even if your state doesn't have the law.</span>Wondering Mindshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01674669856017394565noreply@blogger.com7Connecticut, USA41.6032207 -73.08774900000003140.0814477 -75.669536000000036 43.124993700000005 -70.505962000000025tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8793633392373439642.post-82771428962683085662013-12-12T22:21:00.000-05:002013-12-12T22:26:46.231-05:00Splendid F***in' Week<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Had plans with a friend, those got cancelled.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Then tonight, I texted someone I had thought was a good friend, and got back a "Who's this?".</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">For starters, who deletes contacts these days, when you can have an unlimited number of them?</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Second, who deletes a number, and someone off Facebook and Skype, and doesn't say a word to them, or give them a reason as to why they are doing so.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Cowards.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Pussies.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Truthfully, reading back those last two words, it's better for me to not be associated with people like that.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I can't even begin to delve into the mindset of why someone would eliminate someone entirely from their life, without giving a reason.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Falling outs over time. Understandable.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Fights. Understandable.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">We were talking a few days ago just fine, and suddenly, (as HOVA likes to say) poof -- vamoose, son of a bitch.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I know it's been 5-6 weeks since my last post. But if I never post again, at least people may begin to get an understanding of where things sped-up down the slope.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Updated (literally two minutes after posting):<br /></span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Got a text from a third person, telling me basically: "It has been nice knowing you. Have a nice life."</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Come on, bring it on world!</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I'm gonna at least go out in style...</span>Wondering Mindshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01674669856017394565noreply@blogger.com12Suffern, NY, USA41.1148179 -74.14958890000002641.066964399999996 -74.230269900000025 41.1626714 -74.068907900000028tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8793633392373439642.post-18925360348377481792013-10-29T08:23:00.000-04:002013-10-29T08:23:23.733-04:00Law Firms Getting Sexist<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">The law firms of "Clifford Chance" sent out a memo last week, to all female employees, with handy tips on what to do, entitled: "Presentation Tips for Women".</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Because that title, and the fact that they didn't make another one for men, wasn't enough to get them into a little bit of trouble, instead they filled the memo with all sorts of goodies.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Some of the things included:</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
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<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">-"Like" you've got to lose "um" and "uh," "you know," "OK," and "Like."</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">- Don't giggle; Don't squirm; Don't tilt your head.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">- Practice hard words.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">- Wear a suit, not your party outfit.</span></div>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">And my favorite:</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">- No one heard Hillary the day she showed cleavage.</span></div>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">One would think that law firms would be smarter than this...</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">However most of these people did spend the money on law school and will never make it back unless they scam hundreds of other people out of their money...so who knows.</span>Wondering Mindshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01674669856017394565noreply@blogger.com10Clifford Chance, Washington, DC, USA38.907230899999988 -77.03646409999998938.709493899999991 -77.359187599999984 39.104967899999984 -76.7137406tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8793633392373439642.post-53792720304403576422013-10-21T09:12:00.000-04:002013-10-21T09:12:14.440-04:00What Do You Look For?<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Over time I have discovered that girls don't know what they are looking for.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I base this solely on one thing: Myself.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Sure, I am vertically challenged (short, for the wordly challenged).</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">And I am not the beautiful hulk that they imagine. To be honest about myself, I am not great looking, but I am not ugly.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">But I feel like other qualities that people seek, I possess.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">College Educated? Check.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Full time job? Check.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Solid income? Check.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">4 Wheels + an Engine? Check.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Sense of humour? Check.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Brains, not trains? Check.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Likes kids? Check.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">A blog? Hell yeah.</span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">So what is exactly that people are looking for that I am missing?<br /><br />Oh yeah, I don't like the Beatles. That must be it.</span>Wondering Mindshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01674669856017394565noreply@blogger.com6CERN, Route de Meyrin 385, 1217 Meyrin, Switzerland46.2339591 6.056087299999944746.2312131 6.0510447999999446 46.2367051 6.0611297999999447